November 8, 2014

The struggle is real.....

I'm SO sorry this is late!!! I meant to post it last night but got home late from the movies with my son and little brother Travis. I started writing and realized I wasn't making any sense at all (worse than normal) so I figured I'd finish in the morning ;-)

**If you are NEW to me... Welcome!! My name is Lallenia and I am on day 5 of trying to  not eat processed sugar for 21 days. I am blogging about this each day ... so really welcome to my diary (read at your own risk). If you'd like to start from day one you can here

Let's dive in!

Wait.. first I have to say WHOA! I'm slightly in shock of the number of people who read my last blog! Creepers.....

j/k  But honestly I really didn't expect that kind of feedback or readership.... I hope this means that more people are crazy like me. And go get help without feeling bad about it or think it will make others perceive them as "not stable". Especially knowing almost every single person who reaches their fullest potential do it.

NOW let's dive in!!

For breakfast: 
I had coffee (duh), rolled oats, sugar free syrup, cinnamon, blueberries and coconut milk... I love it.
check out that SWEET hunny bunny coffee cup ;-) 

I kind of had to rush out of the house this morning as I had my Dr. appointment for my shoulder.

On the way out I noticed my hubby and I were wearing our matching Big Birge shoes....
awwwwww HOW CUUUTTEE!!!!!!
Well... I guess they really don't match all that much... but still it entertained me. (I get easily amused if you can't tell) And if finding out I was crazy yesterday (in this post) wasn't already enough, Brad was confused at why I needed to take pictures of our shoes and then take 3 more because the first 2 made it look like my feet were bigger than his.... I didn't want you guys to think I have huge feet!

Speaking of crazy.... I had my Dr. appointment today for my shoulder (If you don't know already from previous blogs I've had a few shoulder surgeries on my right shoulder from a dislocation and it's not getting better). Basically in a nice way he said I'm crazy because i have the strength & stability he's looking for so I will need a second opinion to see why it's not getting better. I looked at him and said point blank, "Dr.----, Are you firing me as your patient?"

It was super amusing as I'm sure he doesn't get asked that too often. He kind of looked at me not sure what to say.... Isn't is funny how when people are asked things directly and to the point it takes them by surprise.... I let him sweat for a few seconds than laughed and said I'm just kidding but you are aren't you?

I need a second opinion because my bicep is still in a lot of pain and the anterior part of my shoulder is really tender where the long head bicep inserts into the shoulder. This has been going on since after my FIRST surgery (Jan 2011)! I figured the second one would fix it.... nope the pain and irritation and scare it's going to come out again it STILL there. =(

He thinks they may need to go in and release my bicep muscle (another surgery) If I ever want to swim or do push ups again... so I need to see another specialist to see if they also think that's the right route or can come up with another solution.

While I was there for almost TWO hours (waiting my life away...) I was reading my book of the week which is "Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill.  (AWESOME read!)

I came across this:

Made this XL for you to read ^^^


This was rather motivating for my challenge. I totally agree that if you are successful but in bad health mentally, physically, emotionally, or sexually you will not be able to fully enjoy your success of any kind (not just money). If you look at these you will notice these are all things YOU can control and master if you choose to.

If you feel like you're stuck in a rut read down that list and figure out what "ill health" you are suffering from and get help!.... dig into this issue either with a therapist, a trusted friend or family member, journal, hire a personal trainer, research and learn on your own, or hey... even start a blog.... you'd be surprised at how much happier you will feel just by releasing yourself and being vulnerable as needed. Make it a priority in your life to develop you.

I'll go first!!! (OH!! pick me! pick me!)

From that list I need to work on:

A. Over indulgence in food not conductive to health... this is why I am (doing my best) to remove processed sugar for 21 days... I love my sweets and seriously will eat WAY more than you can imagine... this makes me feel and look horrible.

B. Wrong habits of thoughts, giving expression to the negative-I AM a positive person really but I find that sometimes I feel like I'm not good enough or deserve success in my life. I know this stems from allowing my thoughts to take me there so I am learning to redirect my thinking. (this is a constant battle and why I hired a therapist to work with me on these issues)

C. Wrong use of & over, indulgence of sex; Like I'm really going to talk to you about my sex life.... maybe when I can have a glass of wine again and am writing my blog we will dive into that (bow chica wow wow)

D. Lack of proper Physical Exercise- Believe it or not... I think I have more sense of balance with this now more than ever. I'm not working out near as much because of medical issues but I don't feel guilty if I miss a day. Yes i want to workout more intense and miss that part but I understand this is just a stage in my life at the same time.

E. Adequate supply of fresh air due to Improper breathing... I want to learn how to truly breathe in and feel the oxygen in me.... sounds crazy but I know people do this and find it very helpful... (maybe my next challenge who knows!?)

After finally leaving the Doctor office I had to run a few other errands so ate this delicious snack.
yuum! Quest bars to the RESUCE! 

For a snack I had tuna, cucumber and crackers... this is my go to snack... easy and good for you! Plus i love the  crunch of these crackers!! (no added sugar!)


After that Wyatt and I went with Uncle Travis to get sushi & see Big Hero 6.

We split 4 rolls so I didn't over do it even though I could totally eat that whole plate easily to myself! ....my son LOVES it! See! (yes i am bragging that my son is a great eater and is 4... because I set that foundation when he was young)

 
Uncle Travis an Wyatt... how cute!!!!!
If you get a chance you HAVE to go see Big Hero 6! OMG...I LOVED it!! So adorbable!!!  I will admit there were a few times i cried (some happy, some sad).... of course I am a huge baby in the movies which is why I prefer Disney movies because they always have a feel good ending (and I don't have nightmares.)

no worries we took this at the end when people were leaving. I'm not that rude! 
Can i just tell you HOW HARD it was to not eat the Reese's Pieces with the popcorn.... that is one of my ALL TIME favorite cheats is popcorn mixed with Reese's Pieces.....SO GOOD!!! I didn't even eat ONE! That's INSANE. I'm hoping this will carry on after this challenge to where I don't really crave sugar so when I can eat it I don't want to or only eat a little bit and feel satisfied.

I know several people who are able to have one bite of cake (one that taste good) and that's all they need... can I just say I hate you. If I have a taste of something that I just LOVE.... I want to eat all of it and have a hard time to controlling that. It's embarrassing admitting this but it's true. My husband said I'm like a little girl when I get to eat a candy or dessert I love. This is why I choose not to have it in the house. Lots of people say but thats why when you can't control it.... you want to eat all of it because you don't allow yourself to be around it.....

First of all thank you for your opinion BUT I'd be 1000lbs if I even tried to allow it in my house. It doesn't work that way with me.

I HAVE tried having things I that are my "triggers" in my house before like Nutella and  then only eating a few tablespoons... it's gone in a day. MAYBE Two if I forget about it for an hour.

I've tried having ice cream bars in my freezer.... 3 days tops....

I've even tried only eating half a pint of B&J Ice Cream.... before i know it the whole thing is gone....

I'm really not making jokes people.... the struggle is REAL. Sugar is super addictive and probably should be considered a drug as it kills more people than we probably even realize through underlying issues. Check it:




It's something I have to constantly battle and have since I was younger. Sharing with you this struggle, and doing this challenge has helped tremendously. I"m sure a lot of it is the accountability knowing I promise to tell you everything I ate that day and the fact people actually read this. If it was in my own personal diary.... I wouldn't get the same results. So thank you for helping by reading this and either relating and/or encouraging me.

I know so many people look at me and have a hard time thinking I struggle with this as I don't look like the "typical" over indulger.... that goes to show you can't judge a book by it's cover can you?

I know I tell you this ALL the time but you all are the bomb.com! I really hope you find value in this and I can in some way help others who struggle with the things I do. I believe God is showing me my passion is being authentic about my life and my story. I'm learning so many others need to hear it and can relate in more ways than i probably realize.

Alrighty, I am about to take the little dude to the gym with me to have a sweat session since i missed yesterday!

Keep yourself Healthy, Fit and Fabulous even if it's a struggle... don't give up trying to become the best you possible!

XoXo,
Lallenia





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